Let’s stop the lies: blaming African culture for domestic violence is a dangerous myth

Tendai Ruben Mbofana

The narrative that traditional African societies are inherently predisposed to domestic violence and misogyny is one of the most persistent, self-inflicted falsehoods of our time. 

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You hear an African unashamedly declaring: “In our culture, parents prefer sending boys to school, while the girl child is kept at home to do household chores.”

They claim with unthinking conviction: “In our patriarchal Zimbabwean society, when a woman is abused by her husband, relatives naturally side with the man, advising her to endure the abuse because ‘ndizvo zvinoita varume’ (that’s just how men are).”

It is a distorted perspective that continues to gain traction, surfacing in gatherings, awareness programs, or even in the Church, where African culture is routinely blamed for present-day abuse and discrimination against women. 

What makes this brainwashing so troubling is that its fiercest proponents are often African people themselves, eagerly repeating western-scripted indictments of our own culture.

To suggest that gender-based violence is uniquely embedded in African culture is not only historically illiterate, but it is also deeply dangerous. 

Domestic violence is a global pandemic that does not respect borders, races, or continents. 

In the United States, official statistics show that intimate partner violence affects one in four women, while across Europe, systemic domestic abuse continues to devastate families at shocking levels. 

Similarly, the tendency for relatives to pressure abused spouses to stay in troubled relationships is a universal issue found in conservative communities worldwide, not a uniquely African phenomenon.

Why, then, do we allow our current culture to be scapegoated as inherently abusive?

Consider the widespread claim that African culture is inherently discriminatory because women historically lacked employment, salaries, and individual ownership. 

Critics point to the preference for sending boys to school and prioritizing men for wage labor as evidence of culturally rooted misogyny. 

But this argument crumbles under the slightest scrutiny. 

How could our culture have birthed a preference for sending boys to school when formal schools did not exist in Africa before colonization? 

How could our traditional culture have prioritized male employees before foreign factories and corporate entities were introduced to our continent?

The reality is that the financial disparity between African men and women was created by an imported colonial construct. 

European colonial administrations introduced a rigid system that viewed women as legal minors and men as sole breadwinners. 

Colonial labor policies created single-sex male worker accommodations in urban areas, forcing women to remain in rural areas while men were funneled into mines, farms, and offices. 

It was this foreign system that stripped African women of their traditional economic standing, leaving them financially dependent as housewives.

Before this external disruption, African culture—such as that of the Shona people—strictly upheld a woman’s right to personal property and financial independence. 

Under traditional custom, a wife was entitled to her own private field, known as tseu. 

The produce and income derived from this land belonged entirely to her, managed at her sole discretion, completely separate from the communal fields (munda wagano) worked by the family to feed the household. 

While specialized roles existed, such as men hunting and women managing domestic duties, both contributions were valued as equal components of family survival.

Furthermore, domestic violence was deeply frowned upon in African culture, with stern, systematic punishments specifically reserved for any man who abused his wife or children. 

A man who engaged in domestic abuse faced public shame and was summoned before traditional courts (matare), where chiefs and elders levied heavy fines. 

An abusive husband was forced to pay restitution—often in the form of livestock—directly to his wife’s family, particularly to her mother, to account for the physical harm and disrespect. 

An abused woman could immediately seek refuge at her maiden home, and her family would strictly refuse to send her back until the husband faced her relatives, admitted guilt, and paid the mandatory fines for his abuse.

In truth, men and women were regarded as equal partners within the framework of African culture. 

It was western society—which historically barred its own women from voting or holding property—that brought systemic inequality to our people. 

Today, this twisted interpretation of African culture is primarily driven by western-funded NGOs operating on a lucrative problem-and-savior industry model. 

To justify endless streams of donor funding, foreign organizations require a perpetual crisis—a narrative that African society is uniquely backward and in constant need of external salvation. 

Sadly, our own people, operating within local civil society, fall for and eagerly regurgitate this yarn without question. 

In an environment where foreign grants represent livelihood, prestige, and influence, local actors are financially incentivized to validate their paymasters’ biases. 

They adopt foreign scripts and demonize their own culture simply to secure the next funding cycle. 

If we ever hope to eradicate domestic violence and inequality, we must break free from this intellectual dependency and start telling the truth. 

Lying about our culture to appease donor funds will never protect our women—it only perpetuates our own subjugation.

Denigrating our past and present will not protect African women today; it only disconnects us from the very traditional safeguards that once held abusers accountable. 

If we are genuinely committed to eradicating domestic violence and restoring true equality, we must begin by rejecting these comfortable lies and reclaiming the truth of who we were.

We cannot cure a disease if we misdiagnose its origin. 

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